Or is life genuinely hard right now and you just need to ride it out?
Ever since I wrote my “I’m BAAACK” email, I’ve had an idea for blog post that I’ve wanted to share.
See when I was finding things hard last year, I kept trying to use my mindfulness to make things easier and better, like I teach my clients.
I knew I had a lot to be grateful for and so I kept trying to focus on that and “find joy in the little moments”.
But it felt hard. Really hard. So I started thinking “maybe I just need to wait for this storm to pass?”.
Because sometimes you do need to wait for the storm to pass.
Having two very small children, one of which woke up hourly (I kid you not), while running a business, was not easy.
There was only so far mindfulness could get me in in terms of “loving all of life” in those circumstances.
I thought that I either needed to be more mindful and learn to cope with it OR ride it out.
But that’s where I went wrong.
Because sometimes it’s possible to step out of the storm.
We just don’t realise because we’re so busy trying to not get wet, that we don’t notice the patch of dry land just a few metres away.
So it got me thinking, how do you know when you’re in a storm and you just need to ride it out versus you’re in a storm but you can do something about it?
Ultimately, how do you know when mindfulness will help you enjoy the life you’re in by equipping you with some new mental skills, versus “you’re just in a hard bit and it’s normal to feel like this?”.
Maybe you've had the same question?
Maybe you've been reading my emails or social media posts and thinking “will mindfulness help me enjoy this, or do I just need to grit my teeth and get on with it?”.
And in spending a LONG time writing this blog post (including writing a spin-off for next week and then coming back to this one), I realised we're asking the wrong question.
We shouldn't be asking “will mindfulness make this enjoyable?” (or “how can mindfulness make this enjoyable?” as I was asking myself).
We need to ask “will mindfulness help?”.
Because then the answer is yes.
Hell yes.
Every time.
It’ll help you work out whether you’re genuinely in a storm or if it’s just a bit wet and windy and you need some better gear to be able to enjoy the view.
It’ll help you notice if you can get out of the storm and get back to dry land where things are more pleasant.
And if you’re in a storm that you can’t get out of and is really really battering you - it’ll help you cope with it, even if it can’t make it pleasant.
I knew this.
I have literally said the above to so many people so many times.
But sometimes, when you’re in the storm, you can’t see straight.
In the middle of my storm, I thought mindfulness only gave me one option - that it would either make it enjoyable or I wasn’t good enough at it and I needed to try harder.
Then I remembered that maybe I needed to use my mindfulness in a different way, and things changed.
If you’ve been wondering if mindfulness will genuinely help you enjoy the life you’re in, I’d love to chat.
When you book a free call, we’ll talk about where you are now, what’s feeling hard and how mindfulness could help with that.
That in itself, is helpful and motivating to know.
Then if I think mindfulness and coaching with me can genuinely make your life feel good right now, I’ll offer you a money back guarantee on working with me.
Right lovely people, this has taken me far too long but I hope it’s helpful.
I regularly use my day-to-day experiences to try and understand mindfulness more and it’s lovely to have people to share that with.
And if you’re new here and you’d like more content like this in your inbox, make sure you subscribe to be kept up-to-date with new posts.
Sending lots of love
Lucy xx
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